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August 18, 2007

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la femme

oh, thud, ow. are you trying to kill me over here?? I learned to shoot skeet in full view of a vista as that. hello, beautiful north woods. yk -- vintage campaign posters from the Machine's era notwithstanding plus a tendency to call people "pal" when they go. too. far. -- I give zero inclination that I miss anything about my own hometown. I think it's the weather; I fell in love with all that weather & now all these years later, all that sub-zero weather is conflated with not just my complicated feelings about me portage county, about how I miss the balls out of x-c skiing across lake monona for a little wakey pick-me-up, about the excellent unremitting bleakness of the landscape, but also (so perfect) that line from Fight Club, isn't it? "I want you to hit me as hard as you can." it's -40 before the wind blows! let's go outside! hit me! as hard as you can!!

I miss how everyone is outside reveling in the weather of a sunny 18-degree day, how "warm" is this complicated product of lowest temperature for the region plus how many days of sun multiplied by how long the season, and 20 in wisconsin in february with no wind is like 79 and clear in southern california after the rainy season. I still even now think anything above 0 is balmy. also, I miss storms & tornadoes.

I miss how there is more and less talk, at once. you know. the excellent of-courseness of the can-do. also, most of all, weird crimes that leave no one in the state nonplussed (vat death. that jefferson co murder that started out as hate crime, but turned into self-defense. with the guy?). o, did you read Winter of Frozen Dreams yet? xx

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